And being a December babe, I'm very young for my graduating classes.
I didn't turn 21 until after winter break of my senior year of college. It was a huge pain in the ass.
But scrolling though Instagram (which... does anyone at all enjoy the new icon? *cricket sounds) or perusing my Snapchat stories is just completely inundating me with images of young & naive lil seniors with DIY caps & lil smiles on their faces that say "I'm acting happy but really I'm like WTF do I do now???"
I'm sure some of them aren't like this and have jobs post-college lined up.
But the vast majority, I'm also sure, don't.
I feel old. And it's very upsetting.
Because I'm watching a group of people graduate who were sophomores when I was a senior. The little kiddos who were freshmen when I was a senior are now seniors.
An entire generation of college students is almost complete !!!???
The group of Dance majors that I spent hours in sweaty rehearsals, rolling on the floor, and rubbing my body against for several years was very close. We all know each other very well.
Once the senior class of next year graduates in Spring 2017, there will be no one left there who knows my name.
WHAT. HOW.
Will I be remembered, for the impact I left on the Dance program?
Will the professors ever talk about me, fondly recalling a particular piece of choreography that I created in my time in the program, as eager freshmen jot down notes and inspiration?
It's a terrifying thing, to be phased out and forgotten.
We all strive to leave our mark.
Because if no one remembers us, then what was the point of being there???
To to make our own memories, and to grow as our own person.
To build relationships that you can fall back on in shitty times.
To connect with professors and professionals who you can email four years down the road for a reference and ask how their kids are doing.
I'm sorry, I'm feeling scattered and nostalgic from all these graduation images and also because I woke up at 4 in the morning and went to sleep at 11:30 because GAME NIGHT GOT INTENSE.
I guess the point of this is, that yes, we will all be forgotten in places where we were incredibly important.
And we HAVE to accept that. The things which once defined us, will no longer define us.
It's up to you how you are defined.
I was once a broke college student with a full heart, majoring in Dance and Psychology, extremely naive, and drunk 2-3 days a week.
I am now a member services rep at a gym, a dance teacher, a Spin instructor, a little more jaded, still pretty terrible with money, and someone who recently discovered that tequila is the only alcohol that won't make me puke.
I will one day be a successful occupational therapist/Spinning instructor/fitness coach living in a beautiful but humble home with an immaculately stocked fridge, a perfect dog, a calendar full of social events, and a consistent habit of drinking mimosas for Sunday brunch.
It's all about perspective.
Because two years ago, the first option was all I cared about. Best option hands down.
Now, I'm dragging myself inch by inch to the third choice.
So yes, maybe I am old. College grads, beware.
Time flies, and this feeling is comin' for ya.
HAPPY MONDAY.
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